Is is just me, or do goals kind of suck sometimes? I hate it when I make a goal, get pumped are ready, only to end up completely failing by February. I feel like we tend to make goals that are almost too lofty to really accomplish- at least the vast majority of people do. Most of us (me included) don’t have enough self control to really be able to make these big changes in our lives… We lack the drive, too. That being said, I think I’ve finally cracked the code the accomplishing our goals! Yippy!
Ditch the Deadline.
For me, the deadline really kills me- everytime. If I make a goal to be able to do 10 pull-ups by July, I’ll work on it for a few days, then recognizing that I have a full 6 or 7 months before the “deadline” I stop, with the intention of working on it again in May. The miraculous thing is that I never EVER come back to it! Does anyone else relate? I hate it! I hate it when July actually comes around and I’m sitting outside in the warm weather, enjoying a juicy hamburger and homemade potato salad, when suddenly realize that I was supposed to be able to do 10 pull-ups by now. I can hardly do one… UGH, I failed, AGAIN. Maybe by December…
Evaluate the WHY.
The purpose of most goals are to improve, right? Whether it be learning to cook healthier, breaking up with your diet coke, or getting more organized in your life, you are trying to improve. We use lofty goals to measure our success, and when we don’t reach them, we think that means we failed. We need to really evaluate why we are making this particular goal. Is it to loose some weight? To get your kids to eat something other than a quesadilla or mac ‘n cheese? To help our sanity- or our husbands? Whatever it is, we need to understand why we want to make this goal so we can have a purpose behind this live change.
I want to lose a few pounds. I am not huge, but my pants aren’t fitting like they used to, and since I hate shopping… I figure getting in shape is the best way to fix this 🙂 Instead of telling myself I need to loose 10 lbs. (which even though I may have 10 lbs. of fat to lose, I also want to increase muscle mass which weight more than fat) I’ve decided that I really just need to start working out more. I’d rather get healthier all together than just watch the numbers on the scale go down. When you are deciding on something you want to accomplish, try to make it reasonable- think about it and don’t make rash decisions when you are emotional. If I did, I might be starving myself just to take the pounds off rather than actually bettering my health which will cut the fat off my hips in the process.
New Philosophy: I’m Getting Better.
We need to stop giving ourselves huge shoes to fill, stop giving ourselves this larger than life measurement to tell us how successful we are, and work on bettering rather than succeeding. Because of this, I’ve had to adopt a new philosophy: Be better today than I was yesterday. This makes reaching my goals much more manageable. If I want to do 10 pull-ups, I have to do a lot of work to get there. If I can’t even do one now, I probably wont be able to at the drop of the hat on June 30. So, I have to start now and get working. But even just saying I’m going to start doesn’t ever seem to help me. So, I go day by day. Instead of setting a day to start, I have to work with today. I have to decide TODAY what I will do TODAY to get better. I have to set my mind to go to the gym today. Then tomorrow, I will do the same. Just by getting better each day, I begin to get closer to my desired size.
This works for practically anything. Take quitting soda, for instance. If you’ve had one today already, then tell yourself you wont have any more today. The battle is always within, its about what you want now vs. what you really want down the road. Tomorrow, make the decision not to have any soda. Now that you’ve accomplished that, the next day, make the same decision. Its a day-by-day process, day-by-day fight to get you through. I promise that if you work on improving yourself everyday, your goals will be reached. You will probably even surpass your goals you thought were way out of reach and would require a miracle to accomplish.
Every morning, my husband says, “I’m getting better.” That is my mantra through the day, too. “I’m getting better.” “I’m better than I was yesterday.” “I woke up earlier today than I did yesterday.” “I didn’t fill up on carbs today like I did yesterday.” “I did the laundry quicker this week than I did last week.”
Your yesterday is your measuring stick for today. Don’t measure yourself by the future- you’ll never be satisfied. But, if you look back and see all the progress that you have done, you will be able to recognize that you can do anything you put your mind to. Day by day you can do it. Start today, to be better. You’ll be happy you did.